So many of us apologise consistently, and most of the time it’s for things that don’t even require an apology. You’ll catch yourself saying ‘sorry’ when asking a question, apologising for things that didn’t upset anyone, and genuinely feeling as if tons of your actions have a negative impact.
Of course there’s a time and a place where you do need to apologise to others, but realistically that isn’t 30+ times a day. When you constantly apologise for small and inconsequential things what you’re really getting across is that you’re willing to apologise for any of your actions. You think that asking someone a question or speaking your mind is a massive bother to others, so needs to be apologised for. It’s not inherently a bad thing to over apologise, but it signals a lack of confidence and need for social approval that need to be addressed.
Consistently apologising for things is an indicator of low self worth, no matter how you try to reframe it. Of course, being kind and considerate is an amazing quality that so many people need. By having that quality you are a nice person, it shows others you’re caring and willing to work past your mistakes. However there’s a difference between being nice, and feeling inadequate. I’m not saying you should never apologise to people again, or that you should completely stop saying sorry. But what you should do is believe in yourself enough and be confident enough to know when you don’t need to say sorry.
Take note of how often you apologise to others, and what for. You might not have noticed it before but you could be saying sorry way more than you thought. If you’re someone who’s aware of how often they apologise for unneccessary things then pause and consider why. Try getting to the root of the issue, and physically stopping yourself from saying sorry. In most instances you’ll be aware when you’re saying sorry out of fear or low self worth.